True Chuck Norris Encounters A priest, a rabbi, and a potato farmer walk into a bar. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks them all in the face because he already knows this joke won't be funny enough. A reporter once asked Chuck Norris why he decided to shave his beard. He responded, ""I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you."" He then chuckled, realizing he was going to kill the reporter anyway. Chuck Norris once went on a vacation to the UK. Feeling thirsty, he went into an English bar and ordere…

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer It's too bad Chuck Norris never cries

If Chuck Norris round-house kicks you, you will die. If Chuck Norris' misses you with the round-house kick, the wind behind the kick will tear out your pancreas and you will still die.

Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because ""The Sum of All Fears"" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.