Light bulb jokes How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to hold the Diet Coke and one to call daddy. How many real men does it take to change a light bulb? Real men aren't afraid of the dark. How many militant feminists does it take to change a light bu..THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!! How many Altzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side. How many attention-deficit-disorder-kids does it take to change a light bulb? Look, a bunny. Ho…

An 18-year-old Italian girl tells her Mom that she thinks she is pregnant. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test results show that the girl IS pregnant. Shouting , cursing, crying…the mother says, “Who wassa dah piga that do thisah to you? Ima wanna know!!” The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later, a Ferarri stops in front of their house. A mature and distinguished man with grey hair and impeccably dressed in an Armani suit …

A man calls home from work... His young daughter answers the phone. "Hi sweetie, is your mother close to the phone? The little girl answers, "No, she's upstairs with uncle Paul." A long pause. "You don't have an uncle Paul, honey." He says. She answers, "Yes I do, he's upstairs with mommy, *right now!*" Another long pause. He says, "I want you to go upstairs and bang on mommy's door and say that you just saw daddy's cat pull in the driveway." "Okay..." A loooong pause. She picks…

The only clean joke Michael Caine could think of to tell the Queen. I remember this joke from a TV interview I saw with Michael Caine about 20 years ago, and it's stuck with me: A telemarketer calls a house and a little girl answers the phone: Little girl (LG): \*quiet voice* *"Hello?"* Telemarketer (TM) "Hello there and good day, would you mother be available to talk to?" (LG) \*quiet voice* *"No, she's busy at the moment.*" TM: "Oh, okay, would your father be there at all?" (LG) \*quie…