GUESS WHO!? It's Monday morning and the postman is walking through the neighborhood on his usual route, delivering the mail. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars were still in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by David, the homeowner, coming out with a load of empty beer, wine and spirit bottles for the recycling bin. ""Wow David, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night,' the postman comments. David, in obvious pain, replies 'Actually we had it Saturday…

An anti-Semite walks into a bar and sits down. He sees a man sitting at a table nearby wearing a Star of David and doesn't like it. ""Bartender!"" he says, nodding at the Jew, ""A round of the good stuff for everyone except him!"" Everyone happily receives a glass of premium scotch. The man looks over at the Jew with a smug grin. The Jew smiles back and tips his glass. The anti-semite loses his satisfied expression. ""Bartender! Give everyone a drink of your finest, plus an appetizer!"" He looks…

Three Englishmen spot a Welshman alone in a pub... They say to each other ""I'm bored, let's pick a fight with him."" The first Englishman walks up to him and says ""St. David wore frilly pink knickers."" ""Interesting, I didn't know that,"" said the unfazed Welshman. Flustered by his failed attempt at angering the Welshman, the first Englishman went back to his friends. The second Englishman walks up to the Welshman and says ""St. David loved to take it in the arse."" ""Hmm, I had never heard t…

'Reincarnation' - My favourite joke of all time Dave comes home from the pub, drunkest he's been in a long time, and collapses into bed next to his sleeping wife. Later, he's woken by a brilliant flash of light at the end of his bed, which his still sleeping wife seems oblivious to. St. Peter appears in all his glory, standing over the two of them. "You have died my son, of alcohol poisoning" says St. Peter. Dave is obviously distraught and begs and pleads with the saint to be given another…