My mother-in-law's text alert is an entire song. Starting to think my father-in-law's rage isn't really from Vietnam.

The genie Three guys, a Canadian, Osama Bin Laden and Uncle Sam are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. ""I will give each of you one wish, that's three wishes total,"" says the Genie. The Canadian says, ""I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada."" With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming. Osama Bin Laden was amazed, so he …

Hitch Hiking An attractive Canadian blonde was hitch hiking. A trucker pulled over and offered her a ride. When the blonde got in the cab, she saw all the CB equipment that the driver had installed. She asked the driver, ""What's that?"" The driver explained that it was CB equipment and with it, he could contact anyone in the world. The hiker exclaimed, ""Anybody in the world!!?? You mean, you could reach my Mother in Canada with that equipment??"" The driver said that she could and the blonde r…

My dad went to Vietnam He single-handedly shot and killed 32 north vietnamese. Next year we're going on vacation somewhere else. Edit: spelling