Two friends are out for a drive Steve is driving, and Jeff is in the passenger seat. As they are coming to a red light, Steve instead stomps on the gas, and drives right through it. Jeff is stunned. ""What are you doing?"" ""Don't worry,"" Steve says. ""My brother drives like this."" After a bit they come up on another red light. Steve again speeds up and drives right through it, narrowly missing clipping a few cars. ""What the hell are you doing?!"" Jeff shouts. ""I said don't worry about it!""…

I had a friend over last night... So my good friend Jeff was visiting me last night, and we were watching this space opera about racing. They had these cool hover cars racing both on the earth and the moon. When we were finally done watching a few episodes Jeff goes, ""Man, what a shitty cartoon,"" and I had this feeling growing inside me that I just had to correct him on what he just said, as a friend. Similar to how you correct people when they do the ""there"", ""their"" and ""they're"" mista…

Magic Number 5 I was walking down the street the other day when I saw my best friend Jeff. I walked up to him and mentioned that I had the craziest dream the other night. Jeff listened as I told him that the dream consisted of just one thing. A huge glowing number "5". It was made of gold and sparkled with shiny diamonds. Jeff's curiosity was peaked. I went on to say that the first thing that I did in the morning was to grab the daily racing digest and look up the 5th race. Jeff raised an eyeb…

Jeff and Mike are in a car accident and both die. Upon Jeff's arrival at the Pearly Gates, he is met by St. Peter. "Where is my friend Mike?" Jeff asked. St. Peter replies, "Well, Mike was not as fortunate as you. He went in the other direction instead of getting into Heaven." Jeff was bothered by this and asked, "Well, could I see Mike one more time just to be sure he is OK?" So, Jeff and St. Peter walked over to the edge of Heaven and looked down. There was Mike, on a sandy beach, with a gorge…