Jesus at the Pearly Gates Jesus is walking past the pearly gates one day when St. Peter asks him to fill in for a while so he can take a break. Jesus is a bit concerned and protests that he doesn't know the admissions procedure. St. Peter tells him it's easy, just look up the name in The Book and pass judgement, and that Jesus is well qualified to do that. Jesus agrees and sits down to wait for the next arrival. Soon, and old man slowly walks up and sits down across from Jesus. He looks around, squinting, obviously having trouble seeing. He looks at Jesus and says "I'm looking for my son. I'll recognize him by the nail holes in his hands and feet." Jesus gets wide eyed, looks at the old man and asks "Dad?" The old man squints, looks closer at Jesus and asks "Pinocchio?"