I was involved in a car crash last night. As I regained consciousness from last nights car crash. The Doctors were trying to convince me that I'm actually a Swedish guy who has forgotten his identity... But I am having none of it. I wasn't Bjorn yesterday!

As I regained consciousness from last nights car crash. The Doctors were trying to convince me that I'm actually a Swedish bloke who has forgotten his identity... But I am having none of it. I wasn't Bjorn yesterday!

SOMEONE LEFT THEIR DOGS IN THE CAR WITH THE WINDOWS ROLLED UP -Ma'am, that's a pack of Ballpark All-Beef Franks. ITS 500 DEGREES IN THERE

"Is that a car alarm going off? Someone must be trying to steal it I better call the police!" - literally no one ever