Thought I'd try writing bad monologue jokes today. Like Jay Leno bad. Russia says it will begin patrolling with nuclear submarines again for the first time in 20 years. Nuclear subs that are 20 years old? I didn't know Russia had Subway. In Texas, a husband and wife are blaming one another for sending ricin-laced letters to public officials. As the saying goes, ""In sickness and in SHE DID IT!"" Mass anti-government protests continued in Turkey over the weekend. The last time there was this much…