Her: (Sigh) How did you burn the Thanksgiving Turkey? Me: I followed the directions. 20 minutes a pound at 325 degrees. I weigh 175 pounds!

Americans eat Turkeys at Christmas. Do people in Turkey eat Americans?

Does it creep anyone else out that Donald Duck eats a turkey dinner on 'Once Upon A Christmas'? Isn't that a form of cannibalism?

For once my family is going to have a Happy Thanksgiving. This year I'm stuffing the turkey with Prozac.