Police inspectors on British mystery shows always seem to know the murder victim. Moral: do not befriend any British police inspectors.

What's going on? A policeman passes a parking lot around midnight and notices a couple in a parked car. He stops to investigate and sees a man in the driver's seat and a young lady in the backseat, quietly reading a magazine. The officer knocks on the window and asks whats going on. "Listening to music," the guy says. Pointing toward the lady in the backseat, the officer asks, "And what's she doing?" "Reading a magazine, of course." "How old are you?" asks the officer. "I'm 28." "And how …

German guy at the French border. A German guy is at the French border. The French customs officer asks him some questions. -Name? *-Karl Schmidt.* -Place of Residence? *-Munich.* -Occupation? *-Oh, no, no. I'm just visiting.* (Translated from an /r/French comment: http://www.reddit.com/r/French/comments/1jrq1z/tell_me_a_joke_in_french/cbhnivu)

Sitting on the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car puttering along at 22 MPH. Sitting on the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, that car is just as dangerous as a speeder. So, he turns his lights on and pulls the car over. Approaching the car, he notices there are 5 old ladies, two at the front and 3 at the back, wide eyed and looking like ghosts. The driver obviously confused said…