Fredrick the train conductor Frederick, a train conductor, was driving his train when he thought browsing Reddit at the controls was a good idea. The train suffered a terrible crash and only those in the front of the train survived. Frederick was put on trial for the negligent homicide of nearly a hundred people. He was found guilty and sentenced to death by the electric chair. When asked what he'd like for his last meal, he replied simply with ""A banana, if you will."" The prison guard shrugge…

*armadillo comes rolling back in the ball return* "Wait.. if you're here, then..." *cut to wife sobbing at bowling ball* "UNCURL, FREDRICK!"

So it's 1655 and Frederick the 4th has summoned a stonemason for a quote on repairing his crumbling Renaissance castle. After a few moments of inspection the stonemason tells Frederick that the castle shouldn't be repaired. Stunned, Frederick asks why. "Well", says the stonemason, "If it ain't baroque, don't fix it."