A joke my Pastor told during the sermon today Two brothers are staying overnight at their Grandma's house. The Grandma says, ""Now, don't forget to say your prayers before you go to bed tonight!"" So they both get ready for bed and are sitting in the bedroom. Kneeling beside the bed, the older brother then begins to pray, ""Dear God, I wish I could get a new bike for Christmas."" Hearing this, the younger brother yells out MUCH louder, ""DEAR GOD, I ALSO WANT A NEW BIKE FOR CHRISTMAS."" The olde…

Purations Two brothers were catching up over drinks, the older brother clearly more well off, nice clothes, nice shoes, watch, etc. The younger brother lamented how he often couldn't make ends meet, changed jobs often, just never really knew what to do with his life. The older brother said ""Man, you know what your problem is? You've never had many purations in your life!"" ""What the hell are *purations*??"" the younger brother asked. ""See? You don't even know what they are, but me, I've made …

Master of wit and repartee Two brothers. One's a dullard (slow or stupid person), the other is a master of quick wit and ready repartee. Dullard goes to the circus one night. The clowns come on asking for a member of the audience to assist. Dullard bro puts up his hand and gets picked. CLOWN: I say, I say, I say, are you the front end of an ass? DULLARD: Durrr No! CLOWN: I say, I say, I Say, are you the back end of an ass? Dullard: Durrrrrrrrr No! Clown: Then you must be NO END of an ass! The cr…