Little Green Man A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. There is no one else in the bar besides the bartender and this guy. Things are slow so the bartender says to the guy ""Hey you want to see something cool?"" The guy says sure. So they both hop into the bartenders car and start driving. They drive for 30 min before they drive up to a gate. The bartender gets out and opens the gate, gets back in and drives through, and then gets out and closes the gate. Now they are at a river. They ditch…

A joke for the Irish. A man gets a job in a pub in a tiny village in the nack of nowhere in Ireland. On his first night there an old farmer comes in and asks for 3 pints of Guinness. The barman pulls the pints and watches him drink them slowly, one after the other. When he finishes he asks for another 3 pints. This goes on all night until the barman finally says ""You know, you'd be better off getting one at a time so they stay fresh"". The old farmer replies ""Shur I know that. But I have a bro…

An American, an Aussie and a Kiwi are in a bar... ... they sit at the bar and order whiskey. The American picks up his glass, downs the shot of whiskey and throws the glass into the fireplace. ""In America, we got so many glasses, we don't drink out of the same one twice!"" The Kiwi nods, downs his drink throws it up into the air and shoots it with his six-shooter. ""Same in New Zealand. So many glasses, we don't dare drink out of the same one twice."" The Australian looks at them both, downs hi…

Not a dadjoke - but he told it to me anyway... A bloke walks into a bar in New Zealand and orders a shandy. All the Kiwis sitting around the bar look up, expecting to see another Australian visitor. The barman says, "You aren't from around here, are ya?" The guy says, "No, I'm from Canada." The bartender says, "What do you do in Canada?" The guy says, "I'm a taxidermist." The bartender says, "A tixidermist? What the hick is a tixidermist? Do you drive a tixi?' "No, a taxidermist do…