An Australian takes a vacation in america... He's driving along in his rented car and a cop notices him driving on the wrong side of the road. He pulls him over and says "Do you realize you're driving on the wrong side of the road!?" The Australian says "Oh I'm from Australia." The cop says "Well did you come here to die!?" "No," replies the Australian. "I came here yesterduai!"

A British man visits Australia A British man visits Australia. The customs officer asks "Do you have a previous criminal history?" The visitor replies "I didn't realize that was still a requirement"

When I visited Australia, the immigration officer asked me if I had a criminal record… Confused, I replied, “Oh, is that still required?”

Did you hear that the LAPD is training the Australian Police Force? I thought Australia already had enough black widows