Down on the farm..... One day Farmer John decides to visit Farmer Bill's farm. He gets there early in the morning and is greeted by Farmer Bill. Farmer John tells Farmer Bill: ""Bill, you've got yourself a nice, little farm here. Really small but over all it's kind of nice."" Farmer Bill replies: ""Thank you John."" Farmer John says: ""Bill, you know, MY farm is so BIG I can get up in the morning, hop in my truck and drive around until sunset and STILL not reach the end of MY farm."" Farmer Bill…

Farming for a Nobel Prize Farmer John is driving along the road one day when he spots his neighbour, Bill, standing on top of his tractor in the middle of his field. Overcome with curiosity, he ambles over and asks Bill what he is up to? Bill replies, "Trying to win a Nobel prize". "How do you figure?" "Well, I hear they give them to people who are outstanding in their fields!"

SOMEONE LEFT THEIR DOGS IN THE CAR WITH THE WINDOWS ROLLED UP -Ma'am, that's a pack of Ballpark All-Beef Franks. ITS 500 DEGREES IN THERE

"Is that a car alarm going off? Someone must be trying to steal it I better call the police!" - literally no one ever