Working Redditors: What is your favorite joke about your own profession? Retired U.S. Air Force here and this is my favorite military joke: The biggest difference between the branches of the U.S. Armed Forces is that if you give the order to **""Secure that building!""** * The Army will kick the doors down, enter with weapons drawn, eliminate all hostiles and secure the hostages. * The Marines will erect a razor-wire perimiter, establish patrols and deny access to unauthorized personnel. * The N…

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in South Louisiana. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up onhis tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, ""I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going into retrieve it."" The old farmer replied. ""This is my property, and you are not coming over here."" The indignant lawyer said, ""I am one of the best t…

Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 the price. What is his profit? Teaching Math in 1960: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit? Teaching Math in 1970: A logger exchanges a set ""L"" of lumber for a set ""M"" of money. The cardinality of set ""M"" is 100. Each element is worth one dollar. Make 100 dots representing the elements of the set ""M"". The set …

My grandfather's favorite joke. Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where ya left it. [My grandfather suffers from dementia and for some odd reason he remembers this joke and continues to tell it.] Edit: Sorry I am relatively new to reddit so I've added some brackets thanks guys! Edit 2:I decided to show my grandfather this, he LOVED IT he was smiling after I told him people from the Internet liked his joke. He was laughing at all your jokes too (especially the what do you call a d…