I'm starting a Kickstarter to bring a lion from Africa and let it loose in a dentist's office.

A hypochondriac visits his doctor and claims he has Ebola. Annoyed, the doctor asks if the man has visited Africa recently. The man replies, ""No... b-but I have all the symptoms. I CHECKED online before coming in today."" Now, normally the doctor would humor this man, but this was a very busy day and he had already come in 100 times this year. So the doctor overreacted and started berating the man. ""You FOOL! There's nothing wrong with you! STOP WASTING MY TIME!! Can't you see there are SICK p…

Gorilla Romance This middle aged, divorced woman from NY City is having brunch with her friends one day. One of them comments that she hasn't been herself lately. The others agree, and someone suggests she needs a change. The woman agrees and decides she is going to take a trip. The next morning she visits a travel agency, and books a three week trip to Africa. When she gets there she has a wonderful time visiting museums, shopping, and so forth. Finally, as the main feature of her trip, she goe…

A Little Man A man walks into a bar and says, ""Bartender, give me two shots."" Bartender says, ""You want them both now or one at a time?"" The guy says,"" Oh, I want them both now. One's for me and one's for this little guy here,"" and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket. The bartender asks ""He can drink?"" ""Oh, sure. He can drink."" So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up. ""That's amazing"" says the bartender. ""What else can he do, ca…