You really dropped the ball today Ted. You're fired. "Please, no. I can try harder." You operate a wrecking crane, man. People died.

Why did Ted get fired from his job? Because he would only do the _bear_ minimum?

What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common? They can both smell it, but they'll get fired if they eat it!

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair, he has his first meeting with The Devil... The Devil: Why so glum? Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell. The Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here... You a drinking' man? Guy: Sure, I love to drink. The Devil: Well you're gonna love Mondays. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, beer ...we drink until we throw up and then we dr…