What do the Dallas Cowboys and the Rev. Billie Graham have in common? Both can make 70,000 people stand up and shout "JESUS CHRIST!"

Where is Jesus today? A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, **"Where is Jesus today?"** Steven raises his hand and says, *"He's in Heaven."* Mary answers, *"He's in my heart."* Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, **"He's in our bathroom!"** The surprised teacher asks Little Johnny how he knows this. **"Well,"** Little Johnny says, **"every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom d…

What is Easter? As told to me by a priest when I was little: Three bad Catholics die and go to heaven. Saint Peter says to them "To get into heaven, you must pass a quiz first. What is Easter?" The first Catholic steps up and says, "Easter is the holiday when a big fat man comes down your chimney and hands out presents." Saint Peter says, "No. That's not right. That's Christmas." The second Catholic says, "Of course, that's Christmas. Everyone knows Easter is the day when children put …

In the Bible, why are the words of Jesus Christ written in red? So right-wing evangelists know which ones to skip over.