A city guy moved to the country and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day, but when he drove up in his truck, he had some bad news. "Sorry," he said. "The donkey has died." "Well, then just give me my money back." "Can't do that. I went and spent it already." "Okay then, just unload the donkey." "What you gonna do with him?" asked the farmer. "I'm going to raffle him off." "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!" "Sure I can," insisted the city guy. "I just won't tell anyone he's dead." A month later, the farmer met up with the city guy again and asked: "What happened with the dead donkey?" "I raffled him off – just like I said I would. I sold five hundred tickets at $2 apiece and made a profit of $998." "Didn't anyone complain?" "Only the guy who won. So I gave him his $2 back." I'm not saying our money has lost its value, but today I dropped a $5 bill and was charged with littering. Jay Leno