WAITER: ""Yes, is there something wrong?"" WAITER: ""Yes, sir, is there something wrong?"" CUSTOMER: ""The soup. Taste it."" WAITER: ""I beg your pardon, Sir?"" CUSTOMER: ""Taste it."" WAITER: ""But, Sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent."" CUSTOMER: ""Taste it."" WAITER: ""Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients."" CUSTOMER: ""Taste it!"" WAITER: exasperated, ""All right, Sir, I'll taste it."" Then after a pause he said, ""Where is the spoon?"" CUSTOMER: ""Ah ha…

""Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."" Cashier: ""Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"" Customer: ""Nah...she's purdy good lookin'...""

Customer: Hi. How much is your paint? Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot of things. Customer: Can you give me a guess? Is there an average price? Clerk: Our lowest price is $12 a gallon, and we have 60 different prices up to $200 a gallon. Customer: What's the difference in the paint? Clerk: Oh, there isn't any difference; it's all the same paint. Customer: Well, then I'd like some of that $12 paint. Clerk: When do you intend to use the paint? Customer: I want to paint tomorrow. I…

Barber: Your hair is getting grey Sir. Customer: I'm not surprised - hurry up will you?