Cemetery help. My wife & I recently bought a house. To get pretty much anywhere, the main road from our neighborhood goes through a giant cemetery. Now, a week before we bought the house, - on Thanksgiving morning - my wife gave birth to our first child - a boy (side note, I wouldn't recommend having a baby & buying a house in the same week if you value your sanity). Every time we're in the car together and drive through the cemetery, I now feel the awesome responsibility of fatherhood a…

A Woman And Her Hundred Kids There was this woman, who had a hundred children (probably from mexico or something). Now, this woman had no imagination, so she simply named them after the order they were born. The first child was named ""1"", the second ""2"" and so on. Unfortunately, the woman and her children got into a terrible accident, (again, probably something to do with mexico) leaving everybody dead, except for 90. The years pass and 90 grows older, having two children of her own. One day…

An Irish man is praying... and he says ""Lord, as you know, my wife is in labor with our first child. If you'll just open up a parking spot... You know how much I love the Guiness. I promise I'll give--- oop, never mind, found one!""

True Story. My wife and I were shopping with her parents. Lovely people, who had just booked a holiday to New York to visit my brother in-law, who is expecting his first child. In preparation for this they needed to buy new luggage. We were walking around the shopping centre and had a few bags by the time the luggage was bought so we decided to fill the suitcase with them, which my father-in-law rolled about with ease. As the day came to a close and we headed for the car my wife turned and …