Cinderella really wants to go to the ball but she has her period. Her fairy godmother tells her that it's no problem and conjures her up a tampon from one of the pumpkins in the garden. ""Be careful,"" the fairy godmother tells Cinderella, ""like everything else tonight, that tampon will turn back into its original form at midnight."" Warily, Cinderella accepts the pumpkin tampon and goes on her way. The fairy godmother waits around for Cinderella. Midnight comes and goes and Cinderella has still not come home. At 6 am Cinderella finally walks through the door, all tatters. ""Where the hell have you been?"" asks the fairy godmother. ""I'm so sorry, I lost track of time. But, fairy godmother, I met the most amazing guy. His name is Peter Peter something.""