Two drunks Two drunks were drinking on the roof of their trailer late one night in Texas. The first drunk looks up at the night sky and says to the other "The moon is so big, I been wonderin... Whad'ya think is closer, the Moon, or Florida?" The second drunk gives his friend an amused look. "You can't be serious.." He slurs The first drunk looks back at his friend in confused anticipation "Well?" he asks. The second drunk then rolls his eyes and laughs. "Well.. Think about it. Can you see Fl…

Sometimes I forget I'm from Florida and then I remember when I was 9, my dad had me drive the golf cart so he could get drunk on the course.

Hey Texas, in Florida it's legal to abort other people's kids up to 17 years.

A cowboy rode into a dusty old town... ...and stopped at the saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals had a habit of picking on strangers. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar and with a quick move of his hands, he flipped his guns into the air, caught them above his head without even looking and fired at the ceiling. Which one of you cow'rdly sidewinders stole my hoss!?"" he yelled. No one answered. ""Alright, I'm gonna have anotha beer,…