A man appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates... A man appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates. ""Have you ever done anything of particular merit?"" St. Peter asked. ""Well, I can think of one thing,"" the man offered. ""On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of high-testosterone bikers, who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen."" ""So, I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker and smacked him on the head, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground."" I yelled, ""Now, back off!! Or you'll answer to me!"" St. Peter was impressed: ""When did this happen?"" ""Just a couple of minutes ago.""