In school it be like 2+2=4. Homework: 2x8+3=19. Then the test: Juan has 4 apples, his train is 7 minutes early, calculate the suns mass. Wtf

GF: I'm leaving you because you're obsessed with Spanish puns and Despicable Me. ME: Please don't go. You're Juan in a minion.

"I can't wait to move back to Mexico." -No Juan, ever

In my defense I told him it was my cheat day and I didn't understand why he brought home cupcakes and not Juan from the gym