My motto is "Grab Life by the Balls." As you might imagine, being dyslexic, I spend a lot of time apologizing to guys named "Leif."

Viking dad joke A viking explorer returned home from a voyage and found his name missing from the town register. His wife insisted on complaining to the local civic official who apologized profusely saying, ""I must have taken Leif off my census.""

In honor of Leif Erikson Day... Leif Erikson returned to his village after many years sailing the ocean and discovering new lands. When he arrived home, he noticed his name was no longer in the town records. Puzzled, he visited the census-taker to inquire about the error. ""I've been a dedicated member of this community for many years. Why am I not on the town list?"" he asked. ""I'm sorry about the mistake, Mr. Erikson,"" replied the clerk, ""I must've taken Leif off my census!""