A police officer pulls a man over for driving all over the road... ...and discovers the man has clearly been drinking. Officer: ""You'll have to come with me for a breathalyzer test, sir."" Man: ""I'm afraid I can't do that officer, I'm ams-- *hic* alths-- I'm asthmatic. I could have an episode."" O: ""I see. In that case, I'll need to take you down to the station for a blood test."" M: ""I can't do that either, see, because I'm a helmpho-- a hemophiliac. I could bleed out."" O: ""*sigh*... okay, just stand right there and hold your arms out to your sides, tilt your head straight back, and touch your nose with your right index finger."" M: ""I'm afraid I can't do that either, because I.................."" O: ""What, you have vertigo?"" M: ""Yes! Sorry, I can't think very fast after 14 beers!""