My favorite surprise joke. From experience, this works best if you tell it when you return from a trip without flagging that it's a joke + adjust it to fit the trip: Everything went fine until we got to the airport late in Barcelona. We ended up in the security line behind this Alice Cooper type, with piercings sticking out of his face, studs on his vest, tall zippered boots, the works. He goes through the detector and naturally the thing goes nuts. So he goes back around, takes out a few of the less obvious piercings and tries again. No dice. This repeats, like, three more times, and we start bugging the security guy because we're going to miss our flight, right? Finally, the guard gets exasperated and he's like, ""Look, pal, for Christ's sake, just give me all the metal you've got."" And the guy's like *WAAAAAAAH* (hit a high note/growl/whatever works best for your voice for as long as you can, flash devil signs with your hands in the air, fall to your knees, commitment is key) Then he went through again and everything was fine.