Two men arguing There was two men one named bill , the other clarence . they lived on opposite sides of a river . Neither of the men could swim , and each day they would stand on opposite sides of the river cursing at each other . Bill would always say if I could swim I would come over there an kick your butt . This went on for years an years . The corp of engineers came one day an built a bridge across the river . Clarence stood there on the other side doing his usual slurring an such . Bill was fuming mad of course and was slinging his usual butt whoopin threats back across the river . Bill went home , telling his wife all the things that Clarence had said , Bills wife said why don't you walk across that new bridge and end this feuding once an for all . Bill got half way across the bridge then turned an ran back to his house , an hid under his bed . His wife asked him what he was so afraid of . Bill said he got half way across the bridge an there was a big sign that said Clearance 13 foot an six inches . He said that feller looked a lot smaller than that when he was standing on the other side of that river.