A police officer pulls over a speeding car.. A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, *‘I clocked you at 120 km/h sir.’* The driver says, *‘Christ, officer I had it on cruise control at 100, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.’* Not looking up from her knitting the wife says, *‘Now don’t be silly dear, you know that this car doesn’t have cruise control.’* As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, *‘Can’t you please keep your mouth shut for once?’* The wife smiles demurely and says, *‘You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did.’* As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit. The man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, *‘F**k it woman, can’t you keep your mouth shut?’* The officer frowns and says, *‘And I notice that you’re not wearing your seat belt sir. That’s an automatic $75 fine.’* The driver says, *‘Yeah well, you see officer, I had it on but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.*’ The wife says, *‘Now dear, you know very well that you didn’t have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you’re driving.’* And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, *‘WHY DON’T YOU shut the f**k up?* The officer looks over at the woman and asks, *‘Does your husband always talk to you this way Ma’am?’* The Wife replies, *‘Only when he’s drunk.’*