A cowboy walks into a bar in Texas... and sees a beautiful blonde sitting there with her boyfriend. He pulls out his gun, and shoots the boyfriend. Then he walks up to the girl and asks, ""What a lovely girl like you doing in a place like this all alone.""

eer booze and fun!' 'A small balding man storms into a local bar and demands ""Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got. I'm so mad I can't even see straight."" The bartender noticing that the little man is a bit the worse for wear pours him a double of Southern Comfort. The man swills down the drink and says ""Gimme another one."" The bartender pours the drink but says ""Now before I give you this why don't you let off a little steam and tell me why you're so upset?"" So the man begins …

A blonde was on vacation in Louisiana with her boyfriend She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes, but didn't want to pay a fortune for them. So she headed out to the swamp, determined to catch herself an alligator. Her boyfriend stayed at the hotel. Later that day, she stood waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand. She heard the unmistakable purr of a full-grown gator, spotted it drifting by and shot it dead! She pulled it out of the water and examined it. "Nope..…

I farted alone in a room and then my girlfriend's dad came in. Now I have to pretend like something is dead in the walls and help him look.