Stephen is a much nicer name than "hen from a previous marriage."

When your mate says his name is Stephen with a 'ph' to the cashier and he gets his Starbucks cup back reading 'PHEVEN'. That.

Marriage counsellor: What's the problem? Wife: He is so literal. It drives me mad. MC: And how do you feel, Stephen? Me: With my hands.

Whenever a guy named Stephen tries to tell me what to do I shout, "you're not my real hen!" and run away