State Trooper pulls a car over A Texas State trooper pulled a car over on I-35 about 2 miles south of Waco Texas. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a magician and a juggler and was on his way to Austin to do a show for the Shrine Circus. He didn't want to be late.   The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said that if the driver would do a little juggling for him, then he wouldn't give him a ticket. He told the trooper he had s…

I spend 90% of my time in Texas doing u-turns under highway overpasses trying to get somewhere I can see but can't drive to for some reason.

A Blind Man Goes For A Holiday A blind man goes for a holiday in Texas. He took a taxi from the airport to his hotel. He could sense that the taxi was very big and spacious. He said to the driver, ""Wow, you have a big taxi!"" The driver replied, ""Yes, everything is big in Texas."" When he reached the hotel, he could feel that the main lobby was huge. He told the manager, ""Your hotel must be really big."" The manager said,"" I know, everything's big in Texas."" Later in the day, he was walking…

A question of scale A Texas rancher and a Vermont dairy farmer are having a conversation about their farming operations at a cattleman's conference. The Vermont man asks how many acres of corn the Texan grew this year. ""I don't grow any."", said the Texan. ""Oh."", said the Vermonter, feeling embarrassed for asking . ""Well, how many acres of alfalfa do you grow then?"" ""None!"", said the Texan. ""So, you just have some pasture then?"", asked the Vermonter. Clearly annoyed by the condescending…