Why can't Stephen Hawking dance? Because he's white.

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal? His shoulder. One more...what's black and sits at the top of a staircase? Stephen Hawking after a house fire. I'm so sorry

Do you know if Stephen Hawking still has his old phone number? Everytime I call, a machine answers.

What did Stephen Hawking say after his computer crashed ? Nothing.