A man calls home from work... His young daughter answers the phone. "Hi sweetie, is your mother close to the phone? The little girl answers, "No, she's upstairs with uncle Paul." A long pause. "You don't have an uncle Paul, honey." He says. She answers, "Yes I do, he's upstairs with mommy, *right now!*" Another long pause. He says, "I want you to go upstairs and bang on mommy's door and say that you just saw daddy's cat pull in the driveway." "Okay..." A loooong pause. She picks…

Walking the Dog... Who says dads can't think on their feet? And the innocence of little kids ... A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?" Mom replies, "No, because she is in heat." "What's that mean?" asked the child. "Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage." The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you." Dad said, "Bring Belle …

A kid asks his grandmother "How come ive never seen you and grandpa fight?..." / - ... I see mom and dad fight from time to time, but ive never seen you and grandaddy fight... why is that? / - Well, says the grandma, we got married in the old church in the middle of town, after the marriage ceremony, we hopped on our horse carriage, it was a long time ago when horse carriages where still a thing, and cars where just starting to come around... And we went our way to our farm, that was a bit aw…

here's one from my dad. a stork brings a white baby, a crow brings a black baby, what bird brings no baby? ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ a swallow.